Thankful

I was and still am struggling,whether to continue my master studies at NCKU or not.
And I'd discussed it a few times with my second brother.
He's the one whom I'll be the first to approach whenever I'd any problems/difficulties.
He's like the "BIG-BROTHER"kind of brother whom you can really rely on and believe in.
One day I found this email lying in my inbox,it was a mail from him(excerpted):

I am encouraging you to think for yourself.
To really consider what makes you happy .. in the long-term.
It may be a difficult question and you might really not know for now.
But, I would still say, really think for yourself what happiness and success in the long-term means for you.

Do you think going to Taiwan for Master would make you happy?
Do you think starting to work in Singapore now would make you happy?
Maybe you don't know the answer to all these questions yet ..
and even mum said it herself .. you already decided to work in Singapore last time but now you changed your mind.
So, what made you change your mind?
Was it because of some enlightenment over the short period of break you had?
Like finding out how you don't want to be teacher, this might be a revelation that changes your life.
I think the best way to go about it is to ask yourself, what makes you happy?
What do you want for your own life?
20 years down the road, will you regret the decisions you make?
Thing is, I agree with some other wise people that says the age of 20 - 30 something is an age of finding our own identity.
If you have found yours, good for you.
If you have not, it may be time to start asking and searching.
What has this got to do with you going to Taiwan?
In a sense, it is a huge decision that will impact your life and ours.
With mum missing you and you experiencing life on your own, how can it not impact?:)
So, put some thoughts into it.

Yes, it is true there may be pros and cons about your decision.
Maybe Taiwan's Master graduate won't be acknowledged here in Singapore/Malaysia.
Maybe going to Taiwan is just a waste of your 2 years.
Maybe not going to Taiwan is something you'll look back on frequently in your life.
But whatever the pros and whatever the cons, always ask yourself, what do I want in my life? What do I want to achieve at the end of the day?
Will I be happy with this decision?
As a brother, I just want to encourage you to think for yourself.
If you really want to do this, and it is within my ability to support you to do so, I will do my best. Otherwise you'll still have my support regardless.

I'm not sure whether you believe in God, but I believe in the Christian God,
and my belief is that God has the best plan for me.
I plan the course of my life out, but He is the one steering the ship.
What does this mean to you?
Think and plan for your own future, but know that ultimately (if you believe in God), God has a bigger purpose for you in your life and you don't need to worry/agonize over your decisions. He is in control.

I was overwhelmed after reading the email, and I seriously believe that God has sent me him,an angel in disguise who always showed me the way where I should be going whenever I strayed and felt lost.
I thank God for giving me such a loving and caring brother.
For whatever decision I will be making at the end of the day,I am thankful for God has given me my family.
I am thankful for everything I have.

寄生

我寄生在你的悲傷裡,默默地為你啃食傷痛.
一直到有一天你停止悲傷,我便注定默默死去.

愛情如果真的是束縛 為何你能愛的輕鬆自如?
--蔡健雅[雙棲動物]

睡前喝美祿爽炸了~
可是隔天早上的大便好像也會比較黑...?

我的老爸

過兩天就是父親節了.
不知不覺我也當了老爸的女兒22年.
已經長大成人的我,在老爸眼裡卻依然是個小孩.
這是因為當我一個人在家時,他總習慣在出門前叮囑我不要亂開門給陌生人.
而我總是一次又一次臉上冒出很多條黑線地提醒他我已經是大人了.
但他還是會不放心地加上一句:記得不要亂開門啊.
這樣的戲碼幾乎天天上演,不曉得會持續上演到什麼時候.
大概,在他眼裡我這一輩子都只是個小孩.

老爸寵我,寵到有時候連我自己都覺得有點不好意思.
在家裡的時候他總愛和我爭著曬衣服.
他說女孩子曬衣服會變黑.
你說這樣的老爸去哪裡找?
大學時偶而想家了卻沒人陪我一起搭車回家的時候,
他就會說要開車來載我回家.
但是老爸,開車來回大學車程整整6個小時,
你覺得要你開那麼久的車,身為你女兒的我會心安嗎?
雖然更多時候我都在懷疑你其實根本就是在阻止我回家破壞你跟老媽的二人世界.
但後來整整一個學期我也才回過那麼一次家.
我只能說老爸你那招以退為進真是太了不起了.

在我眼裡老爸一直都是那個為我擋風遮雨的鐵漢子.
在我心裡他彷彿永遠都是那麼鐵那麼強悍.
一直到有一天有人問我爸今年幾歲了,我才驚覺爸爸真的老了.
因為我完全無法將我說出來的數字和我心目中強悍的老爸串聯.

老爸真的老了.
當我逼自己認清這事實的時候,心裡竟突然有種PH值小於7的感覺.
這讓我有股衝動想擁著老爸在他懷裡大哭.
畢竟在老爸的眼裡,我永遠都是長不大的小孩.
這樣的老爸讓我心疼,更愛得不得了.

人生的標點符號

我們總在不同的時間點和不同的人相遇.
然後我們的大腦會自動對這些人進行歸類.

那些萍水相逢的人們也許會對你往後的人生產生很微妙的影響,
所以他們就像逗號,微微地替你銜接以後的人生.

有一些人或許你認識了一輩子,感覺很熟悉卻又偶爾覺得仿佛摸不透他.
所以他們就像是問號,讓你總是懷疑他的本性究竟長什麼樣子.

還有一些人惡劣得要命,你巴不得一生只碰見他這種人一次.
所以他們就像是句號,讓你恨不得趕快和他斷絕往來.

又有得人讓你喜歡得不得了,你希望遇見很多很多像他這般體貼的朋友.
所以他們就像是頓號,你會希望一直一直碰見像他一樣的好人.

最後有種人,他會帶你很多快樂與驚喜,讓你每天都活在驚嘆號裡.
所以他就是你人生的感嘆號,讓你活在驚奇與快樂當中.
但是你最期盼的,其實是他變成括號,每天只把你擁在懷裡.

因為幸福有的時候很簡單,
它可以僅僅是當你擁有一個專屬於你的懷抱時.

穿搭

最近在看由尹恩惠和姜志煥主演的韓劇[對我說謊試試].
愛死了尹恩惠在劇裡面的穿搭.
把我超愛的oversize襯衫搭得超好看~~~愛慘了.
男孩的慵懶休閒風由此誕生~~~
So sexy!

Oversize襯衫x背心x緊身褲=慵懶休閒風!

網狀開衫xoversize襯衫x熱褲=慵懶性感風!

長襯衫x圍巾x緊身褲=清雅OL風!

修身西裝外套x汗衫x熱褲=俐落休閒風!

落肩針織衫x背心x牛仔褲x高筒帆布鞋=男孩性感風!


每一個穿搭我都愛!哈!

愛情的鬼

人类對於愛情這東西的理解,恐怕不會比對火星的了解來得多.
也許愛情就像鬼一樣,因為遇到鬼的人總是無法貼切地形容鬼的樣子.
沒遇到鬼之前,大家只能想像,於是每個人心目中鬼的形象,都不一樣.
只有遇到鬼後,才知道鬼的樣子.
但也只能知道,無法向別人形容.
別人也不見得能體會.
--痞子蔡<槲寄生>

於是我開始懂了.
原來很多事情是需要你去親身經歷才能體會的.
若是沒有經歷過同樣的心情,或許也只能拼命靠感覺去"想像".
但終究無法感同身受.
所以你或許能夠想像思念的寂寞,
但你可能無法體會那種感受.
除非你也在壓抑著思念.

當思念的心情,一直被壓抑時，
最後是否也會崩潰?
--痞子蔡<槲寄生>

或許思念崩潰的時候,我還是注定一個人.

距離產生的美

如果友情是寬容的,那麼愛情便是苛求的.
對朋友的缺點顯得蠻不在乎的我們,卻總是對情人開出許許多多的條件.

於是當我們不斷地靠近時,發現彼此的缺點原來也在逐漸放大.
因為我們總是苛求,所以我們無法把缺點忽略掉.
當我們把彼此推遠時,卻又矛盾地重新看見對方的好.
有一句話說:距離產生美.
原來很多東西只能從遠處欣賞就好.
愛情或許也是其中一件.